HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS – What do they look like?

Last week we discussed “Relying Upon the Unreliable” and pointed to several Scripture references that guided us toward making better choices in relationships.  We saw how much spiritual guidance is provided in the word of God to give us a biblical understanding of unhealthy patterns in relationships with unhealthy or otherwise unreliable people.  We reviewed three points: No. 1. How to discern and choose wisely from Proverbs 6:12-15; No. 2. What it looks like when you are not safe enough in your relationship to share your thoughts and emotions from Proverbs 9:7-9 and finally;  No. 3. How to set boundaries illustrated by God Himself in Psalm 101:7.

See last week’s post:

This week, I am led to share what a healthy relationship looks like.  As usual, I will share Scripture references so that you will know that it is not my opinion, but rather, the will of God for you.  So below are three indicators that you are in a healthy relationship:

  1. Discussions, even hard conversations that involve receiving or providing correction should remain free of lies, and avoidance of responsibility.   In other words, you should not feel attacked for sharing disappointments and corrective action with one another.  See Jeremiah 18:18 where his enemies sought to make plans against him, to “attack his counsel and pay no attention to what he says.”  This should not happen in relationships.  You should feel safe to share your thoughts and emotions without being made to feel foolish or ignored.
  2. Every relationship begins with people putting their best foot forward.  However, after allowing the honeymoon phase to end, you should see evidence of good behavior and godliness supporting the words from the mouth of your partner.  Be careful my Virtuous Sisters, evil can sound sweet in his mouth but beware of what is hidden under the tongue?  2 Timothy 3:2-5 is a full picture of this point.  We are admonished to “have nothing to do with such people” who have a “form of godliness but denying its power.”  A healthy, genuine man of God would be a lover of God rather than himself.
  3. Now to be fair, we are all born in this selfish flesh that can get in the way of fully loving our mates from time to time.  But a healthy mate will not seek to control you and have “his own best interest at heart.” Let grace be shown to the wicked, Yet he will not learn righteousness; In the land of uprightness he will deal unjustly, And will not behold the majesty of the Lord (Isaiah 26:10). A healthy mate would not only expect grace, warmth, and forgiveness but would gladly extend it when necessary.  He would exhibit remorse and a willingness to make amends after having wronged you.  My Virtuous Sisters, if this is not the case in your relationship, go into serious fasting and prayer and seek good Christian counseling for support.

And no wonder! For Satan himself transforms himself into an angel of light. Therefore it is no great thing if his ministers also transform themselves into ministers of righteousness, whose end will be according to their works.

2 Corinthians 11:14-15

COMING SOON!!! “The End of Forever” – a book written by Phyllis McColister to encourage, educate and empower divorced and separated women to find restoration and healing in Christ, realizing their intrinsic value to His Kingdom.  

Visit again for more Christian Mental Health tips. Until then, remember your worth is far above rubies and learn to laugh without fear of the future (Proverbs 31:25)

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